The battle for screen time with my niece is already in full swing.
He turned 2 years old in January. “I want an iPad,” she yelled across her house during her lunch break. She can tell “she's hungry” but she refuses to eat. She says she can only watch Cocomelon for 10 minutes, which makes her even more frustrated. rear She eats at least three bites of her lunch.
If it were me, I would throw away “her” iPad. no kidding. I couldn't bear to watch her, one of the most intelligent and empathetic toddlers I've ever met, become completely absorbed in the screen and have it listen to her. I can't.
She tapped, swiped, and stared, completely hypnotized by its magnetism. Screens are already her go-to means of comfort, and her favorite treat, even better than her candy. – and all too often, her parents act as on-demand babysitters because they are overwhelmed but desperate to get through the day.
There's a lot to unpack here and I don't know how to help. To be fair, when we all go out to dinner, I pull out my phone as quickly as everyone else and the crayons and puzzles stop working. We all need a few bites of food and five minutes of adult conversation for him, right?
Even worse, we often feel powerless against the tug of the screen. I have no doubt that smartphones have rewired our brains in a negative way. Not because a lot of new research suggests it, but because I see how I feel and what's happening in the world around me.
The always-on gadgets that were supposed to make my life easier, more enjoyable, and more productive now often disrupt my sleep, ruin any semblance of work-life balance, and wipe out my self-esteem. Masu. Almost every time I pick up my smartphone, I end up going down a rabbit hole, and I routinely feel helpless when it comes to doing anything.
As much as I feel bad about my own phone and screen, I feel just as bad about my kids. We have seen them suffer the most from our device addiction and their own addiction.
If we give people an all-access pass to smartphones and social media too soon, we risk causing alarming rates of “depression, anxiety, self-harm and suicide.” But if you're the only strict parent in your neighborhood denying access, could you be stunting your child's development in an ever-evolving digital world and potentially causing him or her to be socially excluded?
'An anxious generation: Have smartphones “rewired” childhood?
Everyone I know is talking about the new book, The Anxious Generation: The Great Rewiring of Childhood is Driving an Epidemic of Mental Illness. In the book, Jonathan Haidt, a social psychologist, author, and professor at New York University, builds a mountain of evidence that shows a correlation between the proliferation of smartphones and a precipitous decline in children's happiness.
Haidt argues that the shift from play-based youth to phone-based youth has “rewired childhood.” He also said it “interfered with social and neurological development, causing social anxiety, sleep deprivation, fragmented attention, and addiction.”
Hite said the problem got worse starting around 2012. He portrays smartphones, tablets, and social media as an unstoppable force, pushing Generation Z (people born after 1996) out of reality and into a digital world where the rules are not always clear. We cite research and other high-quality data. People hide behind anonymous social media accounts and rumors spread faster than wildfire.
However, smartphones and social media are not the only culprits. Indeed, they opened a can of worms by providing unlimited access to carefully calibrated algorithms trained to lure children and keep them coming back for more. But Haidt said these factors, combined with the rise of “fearful and overprotective parenting that began in the 1980s,” created a perfect storm that continues to reduce the ability to raise healthy humans to this day. There is.
“We rewired childhood and created an epidemic of mental illness,” Hite said in several recent interviews. “After more than a decade of stability or improvement, adolescent mental health plummeted in the early 2010s. We have overprotected our children in the real world and underprotected them online.”
Critics have argued that Haidt and his colleagues are “mistaking correlation for causation.''But it looks like the sharpest critic I haven't actually read the book. The authors take transparency to the next level, openly sharing their data and sources online.
Isn't this just the latest “parent panic”?
Honestly, as a parent, this is not an easy read. The most frustrating thing, at least for me, is that I knew intuitively that this was happening for over a decade. Most parents probably feel the same way, and despite their best efforts, they're constantly complaining about things like, “The train has already left the station,” or, “There was too much TV the other day, and there was too much TV the other day.” We often find ourselves reverting to the old idea that there were too many. Risque rock music, and this is just the latest thing to get excited about” excuse.
However, it is clear that we have become overly dependent on technology to appease our children. If life were a horror movie, here we would realize that the whole time the phone call was coming from inside the house.
Of course, tech companies are happy to oblige. Most companies have extensive “terms of service” that prohibit children of certain ages from using their services, but there is virtually no enforcement of those guidelines. If you ask anyone under the age of 13 how they got around age restrictions on social media, they'll likely say, “I lied about my age.” Well, of course.
Children also love playing games and communicating with friends online, but knowing when those habits reach problem territory has proven to be more complicated than many parents imagined. Masu.
Social media and video games are among the worst offenders. “They hooked children at a vulnerable developmental stage when their brains are rapidly rewiring in response to incoming stimuli,” Hite wrote. “These companies are rewiring childhood by engineering a firehose of highly addictive content coming in through children’s eyes and ears, replacing physical play and face-to-face interaction, and making it almost impossible to imagine.” It has changed human development on an unprecedented scale.”
According to him, the damage is clear. Pain and suffering are widespread among young people around the world, creating a generation of “failed” boys and damaged, depressed girls.
Is it possible to raise healthy humans in parallel with modern technology?
This is a question I've asked myself and hundreds of others for the past decade, while covering consumer technology and raising my now 23-year-old daughter.
What I know for sure is that extreme approaches don't work. A “zero-tech” household is much like a no-sugar household. Children sneak, hide, and lie about the screen time they can't escape from friends, other family members, and even school. They are often inferior to their peers in self-regulation.
On the other end of the spectrum, giving your kids their own smartphones before they reach double digits also causes a kind of zombie apocalypse. I'm thinking of a friend who has a now 10-year-old daughter who spends over 9 hours a day on TikTok, Snapchat, and YouTube. She recently told me that she would “die” without her cell phone.
Anecdotally, it seems that “heavily managing” screen time yields the best results, but for most parents, it's very difficult and time-consuming to manage.
The problem is overwhelming. Peer pressure from other children and even other parents is extreme.
Many of the teens and young adults I talk to wish there were clear requirements and boundaries, similar to driver's licenses and drinking age. In one recent survey, a majority of college students even said they wished TikTok and Instagram had never been invented. My daughter said the same thing.
“The biggest enemy we face isn't that our parents (or teens) disagree with us. It's that many of us feel hopeless. ,” Haidt's principal investigator, Zach Rausch, wrote in an email. “Our goal is to show that there really is a lot we can do, especially when we act together.”
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The book recommends four “new norms” to reclaim your phone-based childhood.
◾ Do not have a smartphone until high school.
◾ Social media is prohibited until the age of 16.
◾ Schools should ban phones during school hours. Place it in your phone locker or Yondr pouch.
◾ Finally, we want our children to have more independence to play alone and together in the real world, just like most of us did when we were their age. Freedom should be given, responsibility.
Not all screen time is bad
Rausch is quick to point out that “not all screen time is bad.” She and Heidt recommend families use technology in healthier ways by watching age-appropriate movies together and playing games with friends and family in real time.
They say the problem stems from sites like YouTube and other products designed to maximize time spent on the platform, such as TikTok. And it's asynchronous activities like posting and scrolling on social media that keep kids occupied and away from real-world interactions that are important for social development. ”
Mr. Hite recommends getting a flip phone before entering high school. I've been preaching this for the past few years as well. (I've been using a $20 Straight Talk Wireless Nokia 2760 flip phone on nights and weekends to cure my smartphone addiction, and I recently gifted a handful to a friend with middle school-age kids.)
Have you ever heard of this?
I've heard or suggested most of these suggestions before, but I haven't seen any real change. What's different now? Can we actually use technology to reduce harm and build a healthier future for our children? Can we have a tech giant that doesn't allow their children to use the same devices and apps that they did? Must try.
Haidt set a deadline, saying society can “end phone-based childhood by the end of 2025.” It's a lofty goal, he says, but we're at a tipping point and he's confident this can and will work.
“It turns out you don't need to convince a lot of people about the nature of the problem; most people see it,” Haidt wrote on his Substack. “Our main enemies are despair and resignation. The four norms provide a way out of the trap.”
Hite has also put together some “take action” resources for parents, schools and anyone concerned about this issue.
I am planning to take “Anxious Generation'' to my niece's family. I don’t know what I can do for them other than try my best to lead by example. That means putting down your phone when you're with her (even if you might miss out on a cute photo or ten). I'm also going to take her outside and show her how to make her own mud pie. The dirtier you both are, the better.
jennifer jolie He is an Emmy Award-winning consumer technology columnist and on-air correspondent.
The views and opinions expressed in this column are those of the author and do not necessarily reflect those of USA TODAY. To contact her,JJ@Techish.com.
